


Regrets and sorrows

by Phoenix_feathers17



Category: The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Boba is wise, But he's tired so it's fine, Cara just wants din to sleep, Din Djarin Needs a Hug, Din cries, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Paz is sorry, Set after chapter 14, sorta - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:35:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28011003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phoenix_feathers17/pseuds/Phoenix_feathers17
Summary: Din has been exhausting himself since Grogu was taken. He's been unable to sleep, too worried for the child he's come to love as his own. When Boba Fett makes a quick stop for supplies, the group runs into someone who just might be able to help the worried father get the rest he needs.(sorry for the bad summary.)
Relationships: Din Djarin/Paz Vizsla
Comments: 17
Kudos: 478





	Regrets and sorrows

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, and thank you for taking the time to read this. I wrote this yesterday in hopes that I could post it before Chapter 15 was released but by the time I finished it my eyes were too tired to read what I wrote. Whatever, it is what it is. I hope you enjoy it (and that it's not too cringy)

Din paced along the lower deck of the Slave 1, frustration and something he wouldn’t admit was anxiety raced through his nerves keeping him on edge. He had been shunned from the cockpit quite some time ago by Boba, Cara, and Fennec all claiming he needed rest. And he could silently admit, only to himself, that they might possibly have been right. He hadn’t slept in days. Not because he didn’t try, believe him he did. Many times. But each time he closed his eyes all he could see was—was. He just couldn’t sleep, and the anxiety wasn’t helping anyway.

Din’s Pacing stopped as he felt the familiar change of the ship pulling into a planet's atmosphere. They were still a few days away from their destination. Why were they stopping? He heard boots clang against the ship's flooring as they grew closer to him.

“Why are we stopping,” He asked as he turned to see Cara behind him.

“We need more supplies, Fett doesn’t have enough for four people.” Din nodded before leaning against the wall preparing for the jerk of the ship finally landing. Cara looked at him, obviously trying to keep the look of worry off her face.

“You don’t have to get off you know,” She finally said, “You could stay here, get some rest. We’ll be back before you know it.”

Din growled at that. He wasn’t some child who needed protection and care, he was a warrior, the beroya of his covert even. He has spent so much of his time on his own, going days without sleep or even food at times. Who was she to say he needed rest.

“I’ll be fine,” He ground out, trying not to yell at her.

“Mando-”

“I said, I’ll. Be. Fine.”

They stared each other down for a minute before Cara sighed and walked back to the cockpit. When she was out of sight Din sighed himself and slid to the floor. What was wrong with him? It wasn’t like him to act like that. He was relieved that he had been able to keep his mouth in check. He knew Cara was just trying to be a good friend, he shouldn’t be so irritated with her. Maybe the lack of sleep was getting to him.

When they finally landed he stood and walked off the ship with the others. They were in a very crowded market bustling with the noise of stall vendors selling their wares and buyers bartering for the best price. There were children running around in laughter as they chased each other through the crowds of people and musicians standing to the sides of the streets playing for those who left different types of currency for them in tin cans. It overall seemed like the nicest planet he had been to in a while.

As they stood within the crowd Boba gave them a list of different items they needed before they all split up, deciding that they would get done much faster that way. As Din walked off he didn’t notice Cara approach Boba.

“You’re a Mandalorian right? Can’t you talk to him?”

“My father was a foundling, yes but I am different from our friend.” Boba walked through the crowd as he spoke, “There is nothing I can do anyway. He is hurting over the loss of the child and angry at himself for allowing him to be taken. He will not be able to rest till the child is safe once more.”

“But he’s going to get himself killed before we even get to the kid at this rate.”

“I am nothing to him but a stranger who is completing my side of the deal. I believe he would not take kindly to me implying I worry about his health.”

Cara sighed as the man walked up to a stall and began to pick out the necessary goods, “Then how are we going to knock any sense into him?” Just a little ways down she noticed their topic of conversation across the street at another stall trying to barter his way to a lower price.

“Have you tried doing that literally?” Boba asked as he purchased his items from the vendor.

“What?” she stared in confusion at the man’s back.

“Have you tried to knock sense into him with a fight? There’s no way he would hold up in a fight right now, maybe he needs someone to show him that.”

Looking back at Mando who was just turning from the stall she thought on the idea, “Maybe that’s not such a bad idea.”

They continued to walk through the market stopping here and there to gather everything they needed before they walked back towards the ship stopping at the edge of the market to make sure they were all together.

Boba and Cara didn’t have to wait long before Din met up with them.

“Where’s Fennec,” He asked as he approached his two companions.

“She should be back soon,” Boba answered, “She had to go to the other end of the market to get what she needed.”

Din nodded and stood next to the two.

“Cyar’ika?”

Cara noticed Din tense up beside her at the odd word and was instantly on alert. Looking at the direction of the voice that spoke she noticed a hulking armored figure and recognized it as a Mandalorian. Din turned towards the giant of a Mandalorian.

“Paz,” Something wasn’t right in his voice. It was neutral, yet strained.

The mando now known as Paz stepped closer to Din but he moved away from him. Din quickly turned away and towards the dock. “I’ll be on the ship.” with those words he quickly made his way towards the Slave-1 and away from Paz.

They all watched him leave, obviously trying to keep himself from sprinting towards the ship. “I’ll go on too,” Cara said trying not to seem too worried about the man’s reaction. Just as she started to leave, Boba grabbed her arm.

“don’t act on that idea yet.” That was all he said before he let her go.

There was relative silence as it became just Boba and the newcomer. The older man stared up at the big Mandalorian who only seemed to be in shock at Din’s reaction.

“Paz, was it?” He asked him. It seemed to shock the man out of his daze.

Paz nodded, “And you are?”

“My name is Boba Fett,” he answered offering his hand in greeting, “I take it you know each other.”

Paz looked down at the other man who wore old battered armor. He had definitely seen his fair share of battles, “We grew up together.” Was the only answer he offered.

Boba tilted his head in what could be interpreted as curiosity, “It is more than that though. That word is not used for just anyone.”

“Mando?” Cara called out as she entered the ship. the sound of anxious pacing reached her ears and led her to the one she sought.

She found him walking up and down the small area with hurried steps as if sitting still was impossible. His hands periodically wrapped around his helmet like he wanted to throw it across the room but years of conditioning kept him from removing it.

“Mando?” She called again, this time softer.

He turned to her as soon as the word left her mouth. “I’m fine.” he choked out, predicting her next words. She wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince her or himself.

“Don’t give me that. You and I both know that’s a lie. Tell me what’s goin’ on. Who was that?”

He seemed to sag in defeat as he sat down on the floor. “His name is Paz.”

Cara huffed as she went to sit beside him. “Yeah, I kinda got that already.”

“I’ve known him since I was just a foundling. He was born into the covert, I was adopted into it after my parents were killed. We were… close you could say.” The man hesitated for a while and she knew he was becoming uncomfortable.

after sitting in silence for a while she spoke again. “That word he used. what does it mean? It’s not your name is it?”

He almost snorted at that and Cara could tell he was smiling under his helmet. She considered it a victory. “No. It- um… it means uh, Darling… or sweetheart.” She knew he had to be blushing like mad under his helmet before it fully sank in what that meant.

Paz starred down Boba for a minute before adding, “Maybe your right.”

Boba hummed quizzically, “Then why do you hesitate?”

“Because he has reason to not want to be near me.” Paz sighed before folding his arms in front of his chest. “I allowed my anger and fear to control me and acted against him.”

“Have you apologized?” Paz was shocked at the question.

“No, there was never a chance.” He murmured, “Besides, he has no reason to forgive me.”

“You have not given him the chance.”

Silence fell over the two as the sound of the busy market surrounded them. It stretched on as Paz thought on the words of the older man until he became uncomfortable.

“What’s bothering him?” Paz asked. Boba only looked at him in response, “There’s something wrong, I can tell. He looks exhausted.”

“That’s because he is.”

“Mando,” Cara gasped dramatically. “Do you have a boyfriend? How could you not tell me?” Din seemed to pull into himself again.

“Because I’m not sure if we still are.”

Cara didn’t like the dejected sound of his voice, “Why not?”

Din shifted from his place on the floor, “Because I did something that made him upset. And after that, I got myself in trouble and the covert came to help. They had to come out of hiding and it ended with many of them losing their lives. Now we’re all separated, hiding, waiting for word on where to go next.”

“Mando that’s not your fault.”

“If it hadn’t been for me then they would all be safe and alive!” They were both shocked at his outburst. Din froze for a moment before getting to his feet once more and moving to the other side of the room.

“How can he still care for me after that.” His words were quiet, and probably something she wasn’t meant to hear. It was definitely something she didn’t know how to respond to.

“Because nothing in this universe could ever make me stop loving you.” Din tensed up at the voice as Cara turned to see the giant suit of Beskar standing in the doorway. The man known as Paz ignored her and carefully made his way towards her friend. She noticed something else out of the corner of her eye and saw Boba signaling her away. She quickly got to her feet and followed the man. This was a private conversation.

“Din? Please look at me.” Din didn’t move. Paz watched him, how his muscles were so tense he was near shaking. Was he scared?

“N’eparavu Takisit.” He whispered, unable to look at Din anymore. He had done wrong by him and he had no idea how to make up for it, “I said terrible things to you Din. Things you did not deserve.” Maker, all he wanted to do was hold his Cyar’ika in his arms. To show him how much he loved him and regretted the things he said and did, “there is no excuse for what I did to you. Is there any way you can forgive me?” Paz Looked back up hoping to get even the slightest reaction from Din, even anger would suffice, but he got nothing.

Sighing in defeat Paz turned away.

“Why are you apologizing?” Paz froze at the broken voice that he didn’t want to recognize as his beloved. He never wanted to hear him so distressed and hurt, like tears were gathering in his eyes but had yet to fall. He wanted Din to be happy. He wanted to hear him laugh and to talk nonstop about the missions he went on and the places he’d seen. He wanted the Din that dreamed with him about their future, not the Din that blamed himself for something that wasn’t his fault. Din didn’t deserve that.

“Because even if you continued to hate me for the rest of your life, you deserved an apology. I could never live with myself if you thought that I meant any of the words that came out of my mouth that day.”

“But you were right weren’t you? Wasn’t I a traitor and a coward for taking a job from an Imp?”

Paz was almost too shocked to answer. Had his words really affected Din so much? “Din, How could you ever think that? How could you be a traitor if you returned to us what was ours?”

“Yeah, and in the process, I destroyed the covert!” Finally, Din turned to look at him.

“In the process, you provided for the covert and found a child with no family to call his own. And because you care so much you wouldn’t allow it to be in the hands of those who wished the child harm. That doesn’t sound like a coward or a traitor to me.” Din was struck silent by his words as he stared at Paz in shock.

Before he fully grasped what was happening, Paz had an arm full of Din, a shaking crying Din who clung to him like it was the only way to keep him from falling apart even more.

“They took him,” Din gasped out through hiccuped breaths.

“I know.” Boba Fett had told him of the event that ended in the child’s capture and how it had been affecting his betrothed.

“I don’t know what to do Paz.”

“That’s ok,” Paz assured him, “We’ll figure it out together.”

“What if we’re too late?”

“We won’t be.” Paz continued to hold Din close as he moved to sit on the floor, “Get some sleep Din’ika, we’ll talk more when you awake.”

Din was too exhausted to argue and felt too comfortable and safe in Paz’s arms to attempt to move. For the first time in days, he closed his eyes and fell into a deep slumber.

It was a few minutes later when Boba, the woman that had been with Din, and another woman stepped onto the ship once more. He was immensely grateful to Boba for giving them some privacy. Din would already be appalled at himself for breaking down like that in front of him. He would probably self-combust if others had seen. Not that Paz minded holding Din in his arms but the man hated losing control of his emotions. He couldn’t blame him for the outburst either. Boba had said he refused to get any rest in the last 72 hours, there was no way he’d be able to have any sort of control over his emotions.

It would be a miracle to convince Din of that too.

“Uh, did I miss something,” The new stranger asked as she noticed Paz holding Din in his lap.

Boba gave a nod in Paz's direction, saying many things at once before steering the new girl towards the cockpit, “I’ll catch you up later Fennec, come on.” The girl, Fennec, was bewildered but followed anyway.

The other woman stayed behind, “You finally got him to sleep.” She noted quietly. Paz only nodded.

“If you don’t mind me asking, what exactly is your relationship?”

Paz gazed down at the man asleep in his arms, “We are to be bonded when the covert finally finds a new home.”

There was a pause as the woman slowly grasped the meaning of his words, “Wait, you mean like, married? You're engaged?” Paz chuckled at the woman’s reaction.

“Yes.”

“Huh. Who woulda thought he’d ever settle down with someone.”

Paz smiled to himself, “He doesn’t seem like one who would get married does he.”

“Not really, no,” Cara answered with a fond smile. Deciding to leave the two alone she made her way to the cockpit, stopping for just a moment to say one last thing, “You might want to find a different place to sit. When this thing takes off right-side-up isn’t really right-side-up anymore.” With that, she went to join Boba and Fennec in the cockpit.

Paz had been wondering why the furniture was in such an odd place.


End file.
